Category: Confidence

Dating Someone With Anxiety – 8 Things You Should Do When Dating Someone With Anxiety

Dating someone with anxiety issues or anxiety disorders can be terribly stressfully and frustrating for a significant other. Individuals who suffer from anxiety will commonly stir confusion and doubt within the relationship. Sometimes this will leave a significant other feeling as if they’re dealing with a third party within the relationship.

“My anxiety is doubting everything you, my loving boyfriend, say to me. It’s doubting your trust when you have given me no reason in the world not to trust you. It’s questioning if you want to be together because of the way I’ve been treated in previous relationships or agonizing over why you didn’t respond when I said “I love you” when you probably just didn’t hear me.
My anxiety is an emotional roller coaster almost every day. And I’m in the front seat every time whether I like it or not.”

Now, there’s no class in dating much less dating someone with anxiety issues or disorders. However, suffering from anxiety doesn’t have to be the cause of strain relationships with loved ones either. Educating yourself on how to deal with someone with anxiety can relieve a lot of stress. Understanding your partner’s anxiety in general and how it affects both you and your partner as well as your relationship.

Those who suffer from anxiety fight a constant battle within themselves based on the decisions they have made or haven’t made and left feeling defeated every time. As a partner, it is important for one to exercise the following:

8 Things You Should Do When Dating Someone With Anxiety

1.Reassurance them constantly
2.Keep them in the loop of your life
3.Text them when you are on our way or when you get home
4.Hug them often
5.Identify their triggers
6.No surprises unless you know it will make them happy
7.Change is hard
8.Be there

An Open Letter To My Loved One About My Anxiety – A Letter To My Boyfriend About My Anxiety

To my loving, thoughtful and caring boyfriend:

So, what is my anxiety? My anxiety is feeling like I physically can’t get out of bed in the morning. It’s more than simply not wanting to get up — it’s being terrified of what could happen in a single day. It’s being paralyzed over the uncertainty of whether it’s going to be a good or bad day. It’s being worried about having a panic attack. Some days it’s easier to stay in bed than to face the world.

My anxiety is being perfectly happy one minute and snapping at someone the next. It causes mood swings I didn’t even know I was capable of. I snap at people out of pure frustration over feeling like anxiety prevents me from living my life the way I want to.

My anxiety is walking around the grocery store for an hour and a half trying to decide what to have for dinner. It causes me to carefully consider every possibility in a situation until I feel like I have made the right decision. It’s more than just indecision; anxiety causes a small decision to evoke a debilitating fear of choosing the wrong thing.

My anxiety is having zero energy. It’s going from being an energetic, happy person to having the life sucked out of me. It’s feeling like lifting my hand to grab the television remote will be so exhausting I’ll need a three-hour nap to recover. Please know when I’m feeling this way, that’s when I need you the most. I need you to sit by me, hug me, tell me it’s OK and fight alongside me.

My anxiety is isolating myself even though I want to be around other people and participate in fun activities because I know those activities have the potential to cause a panic attack. I snap at people I love when they reach out and ask me to join in because I’m frustrated with the reality that I can’t be a part of certain things.

My anxiety is doubting everything you, my loving boyfriend, say to me. It’s doubting your trust when you have given me no reason in the world not to trust you. It’s questioning if you want to be together because of the way I’ve been treated in previous relationships or agonizing over why you didn’t respond when I said “I love you” when you probably just didn’t hear me. My anxiety is an emotional roller coaster almost every day. And I’m in the front seat every time whether I like it or not.

My anxiety is an illness a lot of people aren’t educated on and don’t understand. They don’t understand how difficult a single day can be. Anxiety is invisible in many ways, and because people can’t see it like a cast on a broken leg, they tend to assume everything is fine. They don’t understand why I get upset or tire easily or isolate myself from the group. Truth is, oftentimes these people don’t want to have a conversation about what I’m dealing with. It’s easier for them to just ignore it even though I don’t get that option.

My anxiety is me trying to fight what my brain tells me every day and losing that battle almost every time. Don’t tell me to just “get over it” because it kicks me down daily. Don’t tell me to be strong and pull through — you have no idea how strong I try to be every day. Don’t tell me I’m not trying — I’m putting up a fight every single day of my life. Help me during those times when I feel like I have no strength in me to fight it that day.

Please be patient with me. I know that’s a difficult request when I tend to be impatient about most things. I have to learn to be patient with this illness, and the only way to get through this is for you to be patient too. Know sometimes I need some space and other times, I need your arms wrapped around me and you telling me it’s OK. It’s OK that I can’t control this. It’s OK that I’m going through this. It’s OK that I can’t face people today. We’ll try again tomorrow. It’s OK that I snapped at you. Try to remember I’m sorry.

Read Things To Do When Dating Someone With Anxiety

Montville Counseling Center offers therapy sessions for teachers, and provide guidance and tools to live a happy and healthy life. We offer a FREE 30 min look me over session to start! Call us now (973) 331-0043

How To Cope With Anxiety – 5 Coping Techniques To Help You Cope With Your Anxiety

Are you tense and unable to relax most of the time? Do you spend excessive time worrying about all the terrible things that can possibly happen in the future? Do you drink or tranquilizers to help you get through social occasions or gatherings? Are you also a female experiencing all of the above?

If you answered “yes” to any or all of these questions above, you like many other individuals are experiencing anxiety. Studies say women are more likely to have anxiety than men. Women are often more anxious about decision-making, authority figures, and encounters with strangers. Which explains the lifetime rate of diagnosis of anxiety disorders is higher in women by 33% compared to 22% of men.

Now, the million dollar question is How can I cope with my anxiety or How can I control the level in which my anxiety may reach? Here are 5 simple coping techniques that can help you cope with your anxiety, these anxiety techniques are the 5 steps aware strategy.

  1. Accept the anxiety – I know I know,  why would you want to do that? Instead of rejecting replace acceptance. You’ll have more control of how you think, feel, or act.
  2. Watch your anxiety – Observe your anxiety, notice what causes them. This knowledge will help you find solutions to decrease your anxiety levels
  3. Act with the anxiety – Act as if you aren’t anxious, normalize any situation that makes you feel anxious. Slowing down can help achieve this.
  4. Repeat 1-3 until are anxiety is manageable
  5. Expect the best – Positive thinking can overcome any fear. Each time you find yourself excessively worrying, feel tense, or anxious replace those feeling with positive feelings and thoughts.

 

We hope these 5 simple tips help you cope with your anxiety if you’d like to share some of your own coping tips please feel free to share in the comments below!

 

Montville Counseling Center offers therapy sessions for teachers, and provide guidance and tools to live a happy and healthy life. We offer a FREE 30 min look me over session to start! Call us now (973) 331-0043

 

Healthy Lifestyle Regiment- 5-Reasons-Why-You-Should-Include-Solo-Travel-To-Your-Healthy-Regiment

Healthy Lifestyle Regiment – 5 Reasons Why You Should Include Solo Travel To Your Healthy Regiment

As we know life’s motto health is wealth, and we strive everyday to live a healthier lifestyle. We alter our eating habits, include exercise in our daily routine, take our vitamins but we forget to add solo trips to our healthy regiment.

 

Solo Travel is not only an easier way to cut your travel expenses but it is also healthy for you. Traveling alone is a completely rewarding experience that leaves you feeling liberated, opposed to traveling within a group. Here’s 5 reasons why traveling alone is healthy

 

  1. Learn more about yourself, discover your self
  2. Make new friends, find connects in similarities
  3. Freedom to do whatever it is you would like to do
  4. Peace, able to reflect throughout the day
  5. Flexibility make your own schedule and indulge in whatever interests you

How can we help?

Montville Counseling Center offers therapy sessions for individuals, providing guidance to a healthier lifestyle. We also offer a FREE 30 min look me over session to start! Call us now (973) 331-0043

Why Traveling Is A Great Way To Fight Depression – 4 Reasons How Traveling Can Help You Overcome Depression

Understanding your own depression is the key to receiving the right treatment needed to support you through the journey. Traveling is proven to be a mood booster for people, whether it’s spending time with family and friends or to just escaping daily routines and the daily hustle and bustle. Everyone enjoys a break from time to time.

By traveling, endorphins and oxytocin are released and forces the brain to make use of these hormones to improve your mood and outlook. Your brain will being to focus more on your inner thoughts and will allow you to see different perspectives by regaining energy and clarity to move forward in a positively.

How exactly does traveling help with your ability to overcome depression?

  1. Creating new positive memories can help you realize the potential for combating your negative inner thoughts.
  2. Teaches new possibilities showing us that most of what we think is impossible is actually possible  
  3. Inspires which can help alter our perceptions of ourselves and those around us
  4. Meeting new people can often bring out ideas, advice, and beliefs

How can we help?

Montville Counseling Center offers therapy sessions for individuals fighting depression.We also offer a FREE 30 min look me over session to get start! Call us now (973) 331-0043

How To Find Yourself – 3 Easy Ways To Finding Yourself While On Vacation

Are you browsing the self help section lately; in search of a step by step guide on how to find yourself? Yup! We‘ve all been there; no self help book shaming here. Self help books can be a great start to your self discovery. However, studies have shown that the best way to help find yourself is to explore the world around you.

That’s right! A vacation, which are extended periods of stays spent away from your home is the best way to find yourself. Now that the secret to finding yourself is out, how does an individual use their vacation time to help find themselves? Here’s three easy way to help you with your journey while vacationing.

  1. Keep a journal – document your day to day activities, experiences, and emotions. Writing these things down will help you learn to reflect.  
  2. Experience the culture – find traditional restaurants or activities to partake in. Experiencing different cultures will help you learn to adapt to your environment.
  3. Explore the city – take a tour around the city and explore new surrounding. Exploring and being adventurous will make give you a sense of independence.

How can we help?

Montville counseling center offers therapy sessions for individuals, providing that step by step guidance to discovering yourself. We also offer a FREE 30 min look me over session to start! Call us now (973) 331-0043

 

montville-counseling-sexual-orientation

What is Sexual Orientation?

The term sexual orientation is used to describe your emotional, romantic, and sexual attraction. Sexual orientation does not correlate to the race in which you are attracted to. Sexual orientation is not limited to only being a attracted to the opposite sex but also to the same sex.

Here are a few sexual orientation

Heterosexuality – attracted to the opposite sex

Homosexual – attracted to the same sex

Bisexual – attracted to member of either sex

For years the only sexual orientation that’s been known is heterosexual. We now live in a modern world where sexual orientation isn’t limited by one preference. People now have their own personal preference when it comes to sexual orientation. Whether there preference is accepted in our society is another story.

 

Montville Counseling Center offers therapy sessions to provide guidance and tools to live a happy and healthy life. We offer a FREE 30 min look me over session to start! Call us now (973) 331-0043

montville-counseling-whats-the-difference-between-sex-and-gender

What’s the difference between Sex and Gender

The terms sex and gender has been used interchangeably for years, but now in our modern society sex and gender are defined differently. Do you know the difference between sex and gender?

The sex of a person relates to biological differences between and male and a female. For example, males and females have different genitalia, both internal and external. As well as the level and type of hormones in a male and female body is different based on their sex. As for gender is often a socially constructed characteristics of a male or female in which society categorize as the norms. The roles between the two groups are adhered to things such as what is expectable or consider the norm.

For example: We often associate a boy with the color blue and girls with the color pink. We are told that girls like to play with dolls and boys like to play with cars. These are examples of society associating our sex with our gender roles. But what if our gender roles do not match our sex? Is Jane consider different because she prefers to wear the color blue and play with cars? Is Tom different because he loves the color pink and prefers to play with dolls? Transgenders are constantly faced with these kinds of challenges.

If we can take the time to educate ourselves with the meaning of these terms, we can grasp a better understanding of transgender people and the struggles they face daily when trying to be accepted in a world where they are told there cannot be.

Montville Counseling Center offers therapy sessions to provide guidance and tools to live a happy and healthy life. We offer a FREE 30 min look me over session to start! Call us now (973) 331-0043

montville-counseling-transgender-child

How To Support A Transgender Child – 6 Ways To Support A Transgender Child

Transgender children face many challenges from not only the world around them but sometime from their parents and loved ones. Children facing these struggles will feel isolated, rejected and even become suicidal. As parents we must prevent these struggles as best as we can. No matter where your child is in their journey it is important to support and embrace them without rejecting or being overbearing. Here are 8 way to help support your child’s journey.

 

  1. Accept your child’s Identity – the very first step to supporting your child is acceptance. Your child maybe different but that’s okay, continue to love and support your child. This journey can be a difficult one for your child but your love and support will comfort your child most.

  2. Follow your child’s lead – listen to your child about what being transgender means to them. Don’t assume your child wants to transition, wear certain clothes, behave certain way etc.

  3. Learn about Gender – Understanding the difference between sex and gender pay help you have a greater understanding of transgender.

  4. Don’t misgender your child – never misgender your child even if you prefer your child’s old name or question he/she new identity. Doing so is a form of psychological abuse. If you so happen to do accidently so apologize.

  5. Don’t make gendered assumptions –  although your child identifies themselves as a different gender does not mean they will take on all the stereotypes of that gender. Your child is still an individual, let your child lead the way and show you what their new gender means to them.

  6. Don’t Assume Transgenderism needs treatment – Being transgender does not mean your child has a mental illness and needs to see a therapist to help cure the illness. However, therapy can help both you and your child to cope with the challenges faced during their journey.

montville-counseling-center-transgender

How-Are-Transgenders-Born

We are taught all of our lives to be ourselves, yet how can we be ourselves if we are not accepted for who we are? Contrary to belief, society only accepts us if are what is considered to be the ‘norm’ or normal. Transgender discrimination is one of many discriminations that occurs in our society.

 

Transgenders are referred as someone who sense their gender differs from what would be expected based on the sex characteristics with which they are born. There are a number of theories exist to explain why some people identify as trans such as early experience, unusual hormonal experience, being born with ambiguous genitals, identifying as intersex, and gender roles so many children are forced into may play a role.

 

Given the pressure fitting into a group society has formed, transgender’s often try to conform by transitioning physically and socially in ways they feel are congruent with their identity. Often resulting in physical procedures, changes in the way one dresses or even behaves. There are so many transitions transgender experiences it can certainly take a toll on their mental state.

 

It’s important for those in the transgender community to have a support system that allows them to discuss and work through their inner battles after gender or sex discovery, physically transition, and given the rampant discrimination and misunderstanding of transgender. We accept you as you are here at Montville Counseling Center.

Montville Counseling Center offers therapy sessions to provide guidance and tools to live a happy and healthy life. We offer a FREE 30 min look me over session to start! Call us now (973) 331-0043

Dating Someone With Anxiety – 8 Things You Should Do When Dating Someone With Anxiety

Dating someone with anxiety issues or anxiety disorders can be terribly stressfully and frustrating for a significant other. …

An Open Letter To My Loved One About My Anxiety – A Letter To My Boyfriend About My Anxiety

To my loving, thoughtful and caring boyfriend: So, what is my anxiety? My anxiety is feeling like I physically can’t get …

How To Cope With Anxiety – 5 Coping Techniques To Help You Cope With Your Anxiety

Are you tense and unable to relax most of the time? Do you spend excessive time worrying about all the terrible things that …